The Abuse Of Clergy - Metaphor Or Scandal

The church has not begun to see andunderstand the anger of its clergy. For there is no category inAmerica's social consciousness for an angry pastor, except during thepreaching of a now quaint "Hell & Damnation" sermon.

But they are here - in the village churches, and under the tallsteeples. Deeply angry, with the slow, cumulative sense of hurt andviolation amassed in many small and large acts of abuse.

Clergy are angry because they are being abused by unhappy andmean-spirited parishioners. They also feel angry because they are oftennot supported by denominational officials; are not being trained inseminaries to manage the real world of the parish; are being accusedand sued, sometimes unjustly, for moral malfeasance; and are expectedto run the church as a small business. Furthermore, they feel the lossof respect and authority which once accompanied the pastoring role. Andthey resent the double standard which allows laity to have the rewardsof success, while pastors are typically not rewarded for faithfulpastoring. Accompanying these angers is a despairing belief that suchconditions are not likely to change, for the church is not listening toits pastors anymore.

It seems inconceivable that clergy will become violent, or evenaggressive in their own interest. Not inconceivable, however, if werecognize that clergy are human, and are being socialized in a newmorality - a new ethics, as is everyone else. With the loss of rolemystique, authority and privilege, clergy are becoming normal - likeeveryone else. This means personal feelings now matter; entitlementseems important; consequences outweigh beliefs.

The transition to this condition is composed of many changes whichseemed like good or acceptable ideas at the time they occurred.Updating religion seems sophisticated, but often precipitatesdivisiveness. "Reinventing" the church seems clever, but what we oftenget is confusion. We wanted to stop "indoctrinating" people, and we gotbiblically illiterate, conduct-impaired children. We wanted an"empowered" laity, and we got a few irascible parishioners tyrannizingthe congregation. We wanted "authentic" pastors. What we got is clergywho think that what is okay for parishioners is okay for the pastor aswell.

This is not a drill! These are early warnings of change beyondchange. No matter that the church scene still looks familiar anddependable. Like the hurricane brewing at sea, while people play onshore; like the volcano seething underground, while campers hike amongits quiet crags, so the church lives in the virtual reality of itspatronizing prophecy: "All will be well, for God is in charge."

Hyperbole? Perhaps. For all clergy are not angry, or at least, awareof their anger. And many are only beginning to understand theimplications in the increasing abuse of colleagues in ministry. But forthose who observe the signs, and read the pendulum swings of history,an atrophied church, and an angry clergy are no longer figments of theimagination.

ETIOLOGY

Massive clergy resentment and anger is a remarkable phenomenon,whether conspicuous or latent. Logically, there must be causes for suchdeviance from the archetypal role of sacrificial, patient, peacefulpastor.

The immediate precipitant is the escalation of conflict in thechurch. This is seen by clergy as their professional failure tomaintain the peace and unity of the congregation. It becomespersonalized when clergy become scapegoats for the dissension, eventhough they have been trying mightily to resolve the conflicts.

There is an even more personal variety of church conflict thatintentionally targets the pastor for pain and destruction. In a growingnumber of congregations there are one or two persons who are intent oneliminating their pastor. They may be called "Clergy Killers," for thisdesignation names their agenda.

In early 1993 I wrote a column for The Clergy Journal (published inthe August issue) entitled "Clergy Killers." In it I described theescalating phenomenon of parishioners who target their pastor fordestruction. A massive response from clergy, in this country andabroad, confirmed this description. Shortly thereafter I began offeringseminars on this subject. It is now the most requested of any I do.

Yet another form of this personalized abuse is the scandalizinglawsuits being brought against clergy, charging a variety of moralmisconduct. It is the ultimate terror for a pastor to be hauled intocourt and accused of a felony. Whether guilty or innocent, this threatis so traumatizing that clergy can become depressed or angry justreading about such litigation against other clergy.

The fire of clergy anger results from the smoldering of many embers.The conflict ember is an ancient one, for there has always beendissonance in the church (Acts 15; contesting popes; the Reformation;Canberra, 1992; the Re-Imagining Conference of 1993). Contemporarychurch conflict, however, is marked by vindictiveness, biblical andtheological illiteracy, and by the need for a scapegoat. Congregationalconflict is almost certain to engulf a pastor. This is not a shock formost clergy. It is vicious, unrelenting personal attacks which abuseclergy, and trigger the normal human reactions we know as shock andanger.

Another of the smoldering embers is the MEGApastor expectation inthe church. The mystique of the pastoral role has long included alarger than life model of holiness. This is an acceptable burden formany pastors. The contemporary role of pastor, however, resembles thatof CEO in a small business, rather than saintly guide. Seminaries donot train clergy for the role of keeping customers/stockholders happy.The stress of this unwanted role has been growing with its prevalence.And stress is a notorious cause of anger.

Another smoldering ember is the perceived lack of support pastorsexperience when dealing with conflict, abuse or unrealisticexpectations. Most pastors are willing to work hard, minister tounpleasant people, and even sacrifice some of their personalexpectations on behalf of church politics. But when abuse proliferatesand no one seems to care, their anger is a normal human reaction.

Abused pastors tend to perceive the denominational office as havinga "fire the coach" strategy. They tend to perceive their seminaryprofessors as privileged philosophers rather than helpful mentors. Andthey tend to see their own congregations as unwilling to acceptresponsibility either to share the load of ministry, or defend themwhen there is abuse.

Yet another generic smoldering ember is the perceived loss ofauthority and respect once accorded to the office of pastor. Clergy canread between the lines of national polls which still purport to showclergy at or near the top of the list of respected persons in society.Pastors notice that they are less sought out for moral advice. Theynotice that mental health professionals, doctors and lawyers arepresumed to be the authorities in morality and ethics now. They noticethat parishioners feel freer to challenge their theological teachings,with only their own opinion and bias as warrant. And they continue tonotice that it is unacceptable for clergy to seek the usual rewards ofsuccess.

Perhaps all of these smoldering embers would only be smoke and glowwere it not for the perceived hopelessness in much of clergy abuse.With declining membership, diminishing resources, the academic modelblinding seminaries, and denominational politics, many pastors feel alessening hope for positive change. Therefore, depression is becoming apastoral vulnerability.

Since this affective type of depression (different than biochemicaland genetic types) is essentially anger turned inward, some pastorsimplode. That is, they become self-destructive. In the twenty fiveyears I have specialized in the counseling and care of pastors, I havenoted a pattern of increase and specificity in clergy breakdowns. Inpast generations clergy typically generated exemplary health andbehavior statistics. Now we resemble the general population. Moreover,the breakdowns occur around coping responses to specific role stresses.Intimacy deprivation typically leads to moral misconduct. Continualstress encourages addictive compulsions. And continual abuseprecipitates negativity and depression. Any of these can contribute toa bad public image for a pastor. And this often incites criticism, lossof confidence, and even abuse. Without intervention, such a pastorbecomes dysfunctional.

Explosion is the antipode of implosion, of course. We already havethe aforementioned buildup of implosive pressure among clergy. Butexplosive pressure creates a different scenario. For instead of clergysuffering in silence, and internalizing all the negative consequencesof conflict and change, some are tending towards finding something toblame, and then reacting passionately. Some pastors are shouting"Enough!" and looking for options. And some are taking their wrath outon their abusers and the church. For those of us who observe and care,it is like watching an explosion in slow motion.

DYNAMICS

The abuse of clergy, like any victimization process, is a focusingof energy in a particular way. Abuse is dynamic, therefore it generatesresponses.

It is informative to note the patterns of both abuse and theresponses. One of the patterns lies in generational, gender, and ethnicresponses. The patterns of abuses already noted do not provokehomogeneous responses. The older generation of clergy tries to absorbabuse and rationalize it. The younger generation of clergy are lesstolerant, and more likely to think in terms of self-fulfillment.Typically, they are angry earlier, and more likely to strike back ororganize a resistance movement.

Women and ethnic (shorthand for non-Caucasian) clergy bringtraditional gender responses and cultural adaptations to their anger.The majority of clergy who are women have found some success infighting abuse through organizing around feminist themes, or networkingwith colleagues for support. Ethnic clergy can fight back with chargesof racism, and with the newness of their insights. If angry white malepastors, angry women pastors, and angry ethnic pastors make commoncause, institutionalized religion cannot remain unmindful.

The emotional-rational stages of response to abuse are becoming partof public consciousness. Though there are variations, as already noted,there tends to be a generic pattern. The first stage of victimizationis a confused response to the pain. The conscious or unconsciousquestions are: "What is going on?" "Why is this happening to me?"

Second stage reaction tends to be an acceptance of at least part ofthe blame for whatever is painful, followed by trying harder to end oravoid the pain.

The third stage begins to separate the imploders from the exploders.The depressive pastor begins to think like a victim. The resistantpastor begins to defend and fight back. From there on, each typebecomes idiosyncratic, responding in terms of the situation, resources,and habit patterns.

Under attack by CK's ("Clergy Killers"), a pastor will tend toconfuse the attack with the more normal conflicts resulting fromdiversity, differing opinions, and personality clashes. Whentraditional efforts at negotiation and peacemaking fail, as they almostinevitably do with CK's, the pastor becomes bewildered. Unless there isactive and supportive intervention, this pastor will redouble the sameefforts or begin to self-destruct. And without positive support andguidance, the third stage develops.

Legal abuse produces its own specific responses. Besides the genericones already noted, there is the response of fighting fire with fire,by the resistant pastor. And some are organizing to sue for theirperceived entitlements, or to force changes in the system. The courtswhich stunned and threatened them now are seen as legitimate resourcesfor proaction.

It would be naive to imagine that laity will not react to thesereactions. After all, the clergy are reacting to abuse from laity,denominational officials, and seminaries. Now, reaction to reaction, toreaction. . . . Is everyone a victim? Is hope for proaction, evenreinventing church and clergy unrealistic?

REMEDIES

Are there panaceas? Not likely. What is usually achieved as positiveremedy in massive social problems is proximate justice, tentativechange, and consciousness-raising. The problems already contain theseeds of resolution. And with a rich history of healing and growth, aswell as failure, the church may yet open itself to the human-spiritualneeds of its clergy. It may even find a teaching metaphor in thesuffering and response of its spiritual leaders.

In recognition that nostrums may distract, and perfection isunlikely, it can be helpful to simply open our eyes to the reality ofclergy anger. The foregoing discussion can be a useful resource.Without illusions of comfort, we can note some ways to ease clergy pain.

The most effective proaction comes from those most intimatelyconcerned. Clergy then, are a logical source for suggestions. But thesesame clergy have often been "co-dependents" in the church. They benefitfrom a system which requires certain behavior. Engaging the system(institutionalized religion) includes a heavy load of inertia.Therefore the clergyperson's own behavior and attitude are easier goalsfor alteration. Some wise pastors will understand this.

Changing behavior and attitude is no facile goal either. For thereis both individual and group change to inaugurate. The key insightswill be for clergy, individually and as a group, to see that theirinterests are inextricably intertwined with organized religion; to openthemselves to the prayer and reflection which open the human spirit toGod's gift of discernment; and to recognize the value of disciplinedproaction. Suing the church, punishing abusers, and manipulating thesystem may have short-term benefits. Long term solutions to clergyabuse require prophetic modeling and risking. This clergy abuse may benot only a metaphor for society and the church, its resolution byprophetic clergy leadership may be metaphoric as well.

If clergy were to give themselves to "speak the truth," they couldbe more open and honest about human pain and abuse - their own and thatof others. There has been an illusion that if pastors talk of their ownpain, this disqualifies them from ministering to the pain of others.Countless examples repudiate this, especially the example of Jesus.When clergy now are moved by anger to speak of their pain, they do sopositively as well as negatively. Both modes have consequences.

Beyond speaking the truth, clergy may act on their own behalf. Andagain, if such action is informed by spiritual discernment as well aspain, the actions may benefit more than themselves.

One thing is certain. Clergy must either be proactive, or be actedupon. Clergy do not own the clergy role. And certainly, laity haveinsights regarding spiritual leadership. But no one is more intimatelyaffected by clergy abuse and clergy role change than clergy themselves.Assuming God's call to this vocation includes special gifts andinsights, it makes sense for clergy to speak out on clergy abuse, andclergy role change.

Besides the general metaphoric leadership, and proactive rolechange, clergy are recognizing the wisdom of building their personalsupport systems. A clergy support system, individual and corporate,need not be selfish nor manipulative. For when a pastor includes aconsciousness of her or his personal needs, and finds healthy ways tomeet them, everyone benefits.

If there is an expectation that clergy be proactive in their owndefense and health, their requests should be addressed. In twostatewide surveys of clergy (Wisconsin and Minnesota), and severalhundred seminars, I find them having the following requests.

For assistance with stress management, they request:

1. Provide more consistent time off - free days, sabbaticals, plus dependable backup persons for such times.

2. Provide more administrative support - clergy feel forced to spend much time and energy doing secretarial tasks.

3. Offer mentoring and counseling services - clergy need confidential supporters and counselors for high stress times.

4. Provide continuing education opportunities to give uptodate guidance in stress management.

5. Provide more adequate financial support.

For assistance with abuse they suffer, clergy request:

1. Provide continuing education opportunities in realistic conflict management.

2. Provide clarification and guidance (instructional materials andworkshops) in identifying the abuse factors in clergy life, the earlywarning signals/prevention of abuse, realistic guidance forself-defense ("street smarts"), and intervention to end abuse.

3. Provide denominational support, clear and dependable, whenpastors are under attack unjustly, and compassionate guidance when itis just.

4. Develop denominational strategies to train lay leaders in takingresponsibility for healthy church functioning, rather than expectingpastors to solve their problems and then being blamed for changes theydon't like.

5. Give denominational support for clergy peer networks, and thebuilding of personal support systems. 6. Develop more discipline forlaity, much like the new ethical standards for clergy. Clergy feel itis hypocritical to have double standards in the church.

7. Develop a realistic rating system for congregations,corresponding to the information clergy are required to give abouttheir personal and professional backgrounds. There are strong feelingsamong clergy that they are often not told the truth about acongregation's history with its pastors, nor supported adequately ifthey agree to lead a troubled congregation.

8. Develop denominationwide encouragement for, and training in howto build healthy congregations, and healthy pastoring styles.

Some of these requests may seem extraordinary in traditionalchurches. But they are a function of clergy who are trying to address,realistically, the spiritual leadership problems in the church atlarge. These requests are underscored by the wounds and anger of manypastors who have been expected to solve the church's problems, and tosuffer in silence.

We have not yet heard the full moans of pastors in pain, nor theroar or those who refuse to be victims. How loud depends upon the earof the church. How creative depends upon the discernment of clergy.