Priests hear from abuse victims

http://lfpress.ca/newsstand/CityandRegion/2007/02/01/3497695-sun.html

 

Thu, February 1, 2007

By JANE SIMS, SUN MEDIA

The image of a smiling little girl on a family vacation toweredover the crowded room at London's St. Justin's Roman Catholic church.

At the podium below was that little girl now grown up -- amother, wife and teacher at St. Ursula's school, next to her childhoodparish in Chatham. Kelly Ann Appleton was a victim of childhood sexualassault by Rev. Charles Sylvestre.

Yesterday, she spoke to a hushed room of priests, laypastoral ministers and Diocese of London employees, describing how theabuse by a trusted priest scarred her life and lingers with her today.

She was part of a workshop organized by the diocese andspearheaded by Bishop Ronald Fabbro to raise awareness surroundingsexual abuse of minors by clergy.

It's been only a week since Sylvestre, 84, who pleadedguilty to 47 charges of indecent assault last summer, died in aKingston prison hospital.

 

What he did to the little girls who trusted him over almost fourdecades haunts the parishes and people who trusted the popular priest.

"The challenge is for us to continue to fight and do what wecan to prevent this from happening again," said Chatham-Kent Crownattorney Paul Bailey, who sat in rapt silence during the poignantpresentations.

Appleton described how the abuse changed her.

"The woman you see today is not the person who was violated and victimized by Charles Sylvestre," she said.

The victim, she said, was a 10-year-old girl "who had complete and utter faith in her parish priest and the church."

All that was destroyed by Sylvestre's abuse. "I grieve for that littlegirl because she is gone forever and I live my life never knowing whoshe could have been."

Appleton described how her faith has been tested . Shestopped being a practising Catholic just a month before two of her kidswere to be confirmed in the church.

"I am angry at my church, the church I was raised in and have been an active part in for 40 years," she said.

"I am ashamed to call myself a Catholic today. I have not lost my faithin God, but I have lost my faith and trust in the Catholic church."

Tammie McKay of Leamington was in Grade 4 when Sylvestre first abused her in a confessional. There were other violations.

She put pants on under her dresses on the school bus to protect herself from his advances.

She said it's "still challenging even after all these years to share my story with others.

"I feel like it's time to move forward and actually do what I can to make a difference," she said after her presentation

Gladys Charbonneau, the mother of two victims, described how her familywas deeply involved in St. Ursula's parish. Her husband was director ofthe Catholic school board.

She read her victim impact statement and the grief that overwhelmed her family.

She also read a message from her daughter, Anne-Marie, asking thepriests to look at their hands "to follow the lead of our shepherdBishop Fabbro and join him in his commitment to become an instrument ofhealing."

Bailey set out in detail what happened to the women and how Sylvestre used his place in the communities to prey on the girls.

He also used his role as priest to scare them into silence by telling them God would punish them.

Bailey also told the clergy Sylvestre told police he had been a victim of sexual abuse as a child.

Bailey described his taped meeting with Sylvestre at theElgin-Middlesex Detention Centre shortly before he was moved toKingston and how Sylvestre took no responsibility for his deviancy.

Sylvestre blamed his victims, his confessor, school principals and Fabbro, Bailey said.

" 'These girls came over there every day. They planned it,' " Bailey said Sylvestre told him.

" ' I could hear them talking and they'd come in and sit on a chair andtheir skirt would be up to their crotch. . . . Well, it was kind ofattracting.' "

The diocese is working on revising its sexual abuse policy and hopes to have a draft by spring.