In 2009 I was putting some more of my fragmented life back together and was often reminded of the fact that theree was a reason for my persistence and to some degree my resilience and that was due to my mother and her mother trying to get something done about my abuse.
Alice Miller, Judith Herman, Bessell van der Kolk and many others speak on this topic. 1950s Australia in a community that was wholey in the hands or control of Catholic clergy and the Church was not a safe place for a mother to speak out. Despite that both of theme did. One snippet comes to mind was in the inmstance of being shot at age 10 by my brother Robert. I have recalled that I was taken to the Wangaratta hospital as it was only a short while earlier that I had broken my elbow and that led to some events that became the subject of speculation as to the events.
I was hospitalised on a Sunday and had my left elbow set. I was not able to be woken until the Tuesday and when I did wake I was in pain as the cast was so tight that my hand was black and was tied up to a stand with several sandbags to try to weigh it down. My chest was balck and purple. I was in pain and threw the bags away and fought them until they cut the heavy cast to allow me some relief. Charles Hosking had a second attempt and this time I was only asleep for a day and a half. By this time there was speculation that there had been an attempt on my life as I had been pointed out in the churech in front of the congregatrion as being the living example of someone destined for hell. And parishioners were encouraged to act in the light of that knowledge - this was where the mantra that I "had gone too far this time" was in every statement about me. My brother Robert had pushed me off the roof several times when I had attempted to hide there from his endless bullying and punishing me for "going too far" with the nuns despite Mum, Grandma and Herbie encourageing me to push back and to hit out if I needed to. There was rumour and conversation about what had taken place in the hospital. It had made its way to my mother and family and she refused to allow Charles Hosking to operate on me again. I was taken to the Royal Children's on the Thursday and was tended to bt a Dr Peter Williams and his nurse Nurse Wong who cared for me. It was a strange day as my father had accompanied me and his comments about me caused concern with Dr Williams. That resulkted in me staying with my uncle Stan for almost 2 weeks until something was sorted out.
It was not much later that I pushed back by hitting the nun Vincent with my arm that was in the cast when she once again grabbed me onm the path to the convent and tried to satisfy herself by grinding her crotch into my face. I hit her hard and then ran for home.
On each occassion where I was bullied, beaten or pushed from the house of Laundry/shed roof he would should that I had gone too far. The last time he stood on my hands as I tried to hide on aLAN Hannaberrys side. This caused my stomach yo get ripped on the nails and then caught on the gutter until I dell onto the leftoverr of some gravel in the driveway - it was only a few days later that I hit the nun Vincent and ran home on the day that Robert shot me..
I was working on fixing some bicycles on the fron verandah when Robert ran in shoutin that I had gone too far this time and he came out with the .22 rifle and pointed it at my face. I know I jumped up and he shot me as I did that.
My mother took me to see Dr Patterson - she would not let Charles near me. I know that Peter borrowed the Mullins green Comma and drove me and mum to Wangaratta - I only have snippets of memories about that. I think I was taken to Loch Oliver and Auntie Marees house that was among orchard trees and possibly irrigation.
That brings back memories of being taken to the Shepparton police station when I was 4 or 5 - that as setup by grandma. It was done in a similar way, as I was told repeatedly that I was not under any circumnstances was I to speak to anyonme about going there. Wangaratta was similar in that same secretive way.
It wasn't until many years later when my son came to live with me that I spoke of bits of it when I was trying to put my fragmented life into something that resembled what I had experienced. I am writing this some 4 or 5 years after coming to live with me in Herries street Toowoomba - some bits of those pieces of history are still rather scrambled and perhaps out of order or with sketchy dates or sequences.
This site was as much a tribute to my mother as it was also a tribute to my grandmother for believing me and for trying to help protect me. Much happened after I was shot. The Catholic member of the Knights of the Southern Cross policeman Bill Ellison was sent to Yea as a result of that shooting. I believe that there are records in the paper records of that and of earlier incidents that were reported to Pat Harrison
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trauma informed human rights justice failed institutions UN Convention on Human Rights Rights of the Child and a Bill of Rights for Australia future evidence resilience not providing or representing a secular Australia autodidact
Hegemony: The authority, dominance, and influence of one group, nation, or society over another group, nation, or society; typically through cultural, economic, or political means.
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